What I’ve learned ...

Life goes on. 9/10/97

A day that starts without a cup of coffe and e-mail is the last day I want to live. 9/10/97

Chicago is just as cool if not coller than New York. I ain’t talking weather. 9/11/97

People are nice wherever you go. Maybe it’s just because I’m such an a-hole. 9/12/97

You’ve seen to one big city, you’ve seen them all. 9/13/97

I’m getting real sick of trying to be nice to the nobodys that don’t even bother to give me a fake smile as I pass them every day in the hall.

I swear - I never can do things the easy way. 9/15/97

Everyone thinks what they’re doing is the most important thing in the world. 9/15/97

How can people lose the trait of being funny? 9/15/97

If you want something to go wrong, invite me along. 9/16/97

I always end up doing things the hard way. 9/16/97

I usually would break one major thing - I have never had two major things go wrong within an hour’s time.

Always use the middle of three urinals. It is bound to be least used of the three and therefore the least smelly.

Everyone wants large TV and computer monitors. Why hasn’t someone invented a big magnifying glass yet.

Positive bsinessman traits: stubborness, confidence, extroversion 9/17/97

Don’t socialize, don’t get recognized. 9/17/97

If I had more time given to me every time I made a quality attempt to communicate - I’d have plenty of time.

There are guys at work I see once a week in the men’s room and some guys I haven’t seen yet. Anyone know where the gay’s bathroom is?

Phones suck 9/18/97

I hate my dad’s taste in everything. 9/18/97

Hearts are meant to be broken. 9/18/97

The clouds will come out tommorrow, bet your bottom dollar that tommorrow, there will be clouds.

Dr. Aronoff, Pain Specialist, I have been having pain, can you help me? "What kind of pain?" It’s a pain in the ass, from working with you!

Salesmen are the enemy and should be treated that way. 9/19/97

Imagination is a continual, non-stop process. 9/19/97

Take a sniff, let it out - the smell is gonna kill you as you let out a huge fart juicy poop is going through ya - it’s got that feel - it gets right to ya juicy poop - the poop, the poop, the poop, the poop that’s going through ya

I’m not in love? 9/22/97

They say my title is Marketing Administrator, I think of myself as owner and CEO. 9/22/97

Urine smells like tuna. Joe Hubeny loves tuna. 9/22/97

I hope it rains so the puke gets washed off my car. 9/22/97

It’s pot-luck and I don’t have any pot. 9/23/97

You don’t know what ya got when ya never had it. 9/23/97

The only thing that is more boring than my job itself is training others to do my job. (Jan Podogorski)

I really do love Chicago. 9/24/97

Nothing I hate more than single long facial hairs dag nammit. 9/24/97

As one may notice, I only learn things during the week or am in the right mind frame to write them down.

People suck and so do I. I am a people. 9/24/97

My what I’ve learned list is more like things I know but haven’t wrriten down until the date listed to the right.

I don’t know ya but I do know I don’t like ya. 9/24/97

Good coffee smoothes and loosens the bowels 9/24/97

At home I rarely empty the trash, but at work I’ll empty it if there’s eve one thing in it. 9/24/97

Boredom is a full time job. 9/24/97

Time for a new hairstyle. 9/24/97

I think I’d quit this job if they didn’t give me an e-mail account. 9/24/97

Traffic is only a state of mind unfavorable to the fact that there are a lot of cars on the road.

If I was not me I wouldn’t be very happy. 9/25/97

Anesthesia is spelled A-n-e-s-t-h-e-s-i-a. 9/25/97

Having a pen in your pocket at all times is a good idea. 9/25/97

A TRIBUTE TO A MAN OF NOT MANY WORDS BUT STILL WONDERFULLY MOVING:

There is no reason why my dream girl would want to talk to me and if I know someone they no longer retain that surrealistic quality that I liked in the first place. (pavil) Now you just have to let her know and if G.I. Joe was right (and I think 9/25/97 that he is) then that would also be half the battle. (pavil)

Thus math proves that you have won the entire battle by winning two halves. (pavil)

That is what it is all about. Winning battles will help win the war. (pavil)

The war is important no matter what your fighting for. (pavil) 9/25/97

I am thinking about becoming a motivational speaker for a living. I think that that could help me get women too. (pavil)

In a way, student teaching is neat, but in another more accurate way, it is often uncomfortable. (pavil)

Life mirrors life. (pavil) 9/25/97

I am convinced I lose weight when I let out a huge fart. 9/26/97

I’m having a hard time deciding if I would sell out. 9/26/97

If I has a dime for every time I’ve been honestly nice to someone - I’d be broke. 9/26/97

I am punished for every wrong or bad thing I do. 9/29/97

Loneliness is silence. 9/29/97

Feel like: Mondays - crap, Tuesdays - motivation, Wednesday - boredom, Thursday - excitement, Friday - can’t remember, Saturday - totally can’t remember, Sunday - total crap.

If I cut myself shaving one more time - I’m gonna have a hissy fit. I will cut myself shaving very soon do prepare for Z having a hissy fit. I look like I get beat up once a week since I have all these cuts on my face. I have very sensitive skin.

My mind don’t work so well when I’m ill. 9/29/97

I’m still looking for the perfect shave. 9/30/97

If she shaved her mustache she would be hot. 9/30/97

Farting is ALWAYS funny. 9/30/97

Your guess is as good as mine. 9/30/97

You don’t know one thing about me (Face 2 Face) 9/30/97

Mail room people think that they are smarter than like doctors. I think they are like smarter than feces and that’s about it.

My ass looks great in these pants. 9/30/97

I’m an asshole, an asshole- woah ohh. 9/30/97